Saint Ives

Hello all,

I am back. I was off for a while feeling unwell so writing took a back seat.

We have just come back from our holiday in Cornwall. We stayed in a new house this time. Whilst we were on holiday the weather wasn’t too great. But it is still Cornwall, which is lovely.

No matter what the weather the colours are always stunning. You get a lot of Artists in Cornwall, whether it’s Rowena Cade the creator of the stunning Minack Theatre or Barbara Hepworth, whose sculptures you may be familiar with if you have visited Cornwall or the Hepworth Museum in Wakefield.

Peering through two sets off rock the right side is higher than the left. The ocean cam be seen in the distance. The sky is cloudy. Shot in Black and White.

Saint Ives is full of artists and it’s an amazing place to draw, paint and just be. The lighting hits things differently in Cornwall. More specifically in Saint Ives. Even if it is raining the blues, green and greys from the ocean look tinted with silver as the light ascends on the town.

I really wish I could live there. Here are a few of the photo’s I took this last week. 

This is a photo looking out from the  headland. Peering between two rocks over the cliff. I think black and white photography can be quite intense as it shows more detailing.

The is high, the layer of rocks in front go out to meet there blue ocean. Harbour of Mousehole is in the distance, to the right side.

We went out to Mousehole to have some lunch at The Ship Inn. You can walk from a car park past the rocks around to the harbour. On Sunny days like this one the see glistens as it is struck by the sunlight. 

Being Visually Impaired I find photography to be more accessible to me, if I see something which I think I like I can just grab my phone or camera and just capture that moment.


In my blog I have tried to share a few other photos I have taken to share with you one of the things which I enjoy doing with my time.

We really enjoyed our holiday and we are looking forward to going back soon. 

CVI

Hello all,

Today I thought I would write about Cerebral Visual Impairment (CVI) as I have not written about this in a while.

I have mentioned previously CVI is the way in which my brain and my eyes don’t always communicate with one another. This means I can be looking at something but not recognise what I am looking at. I could be walking straight towards someone and not understand I am about to crash into them.

The CVI society describes it as ‘Cerebral Visual Impairment (commonly referred to as CVI) is a form of visual impairment caused by the brain not being able to process information from the eyes passing along the visual pathways in the brain. It is the commonest cause of visual impairment in children in the developed world.’ CVI Society, 2023.

Another issue is that I can’t visualise in my head what people or places look like. This makes it exceptionally difficult if I need to go somewhere new. I cannot go somewhere new independently. For me to learn a new route I have to do it a number of times. Even then I will still struggle.

A good way to think about an area of CVI, for me anyway, is to think of it as though you have gaps in your memory. It is just blank. Nothing there. I don’t know if this is a feature of CVI, but it is something which I experience.  

These elements make life quite daunting and very challenging. However there are ways around things. As I say, doing new routes multiple times. When you go out and are with someone try break down descriptions of that person. For example, what colour jacket are they wearing?

Tiredness absolutely has an impact on my vision, as I am sure it does for all of us. But for me when my eyes are tired I kind of go into auto pilot. This is where my cain is important. Because you are putting your safety  in the hands of tactile thinking.


The other day I went to get into the taxi, but I didn’t realise until I was about to open the door that someone was already in it. This is where it is very dangerous because you don’t always see things, sometimes until the last minute.

CVI is only one of the conditions I have. Please check out CVI Society for more info.

Thank you reading and checking in. I hope my musings have been of interest. 

Books From 2022

1 Electricity of every living thing  Katherine May

This was a book I found whilst trying to look for books from Autistic peoples perspectives.
I enjoy listening to these kinds of books because it allows me to feel connected to someone else’s experience.

The name of the book relates back to the feeling the person gets when they touch another person. It feels like electricity running through their body.

They also discuss their feelings of their place in the world and how they interact with what is occurring around them. This is another area I feel connected to the writer and their experience.

If you are Autistic or have someone in your life who is, then please consider this book. Especially if that person is a woman. I am always on the look out for these kinds of books so please drop them in the comments below.

2 mighty boosh Julian Barrett, Noel Fielding
Whilst this is not an audiobook but a Radio Play it still counts.
I have been a massive fan of Mighty Boost for years. Me and my Brother used to watch it. Not a lot of people I knew when it first came out enjoyed it. But we loved it. I mean who doesn’t want to know a talking gorilla?

I cannot believe it came out in 2005! This makes me very upset. If you have never given Noel Fielding and Julian Barrett a chance I highly record you do so. The comedy is weird and quite niche. But if you are into Zoos, Arctic Tundras, Bryan Ferry and Goths you will love it. 

3 divergent mind Jenara Nerenberg
Just like the Electricity of every living thing this book was incredible. It looks at the way in which Autistic People view and experience the world around them. It asks questions like ‘how can we better design buildings to suit the needs of Autistic People?’ ‘How can we better structure our days to get the best out of Autistic people?’ Rather than it being the other way around.

I sat and listened to it whilst in the garden in summer laying on the grass and just enjoying the warm sun. It was quite comforting listening to a book which questions why the world can’t work for Autistic people instead of the other way around.

Again if you are Autistic or have and Autistic person in your life, please read/listen to this book. 

4 full circle Michael Palin
This is a great listen. I cannot believe Full Circle is a documentary from 1997. It was amazing listening to how he got around the world in a age before mobile phones and instant communication. The way he talks about the various places he visited, even back then is incredible.

The way some places were only just starting to grow in terms of people and population, like China. It made me wonder, what would it be like if he did the trip again now and did a comparison?

I like Michael Palin. He has a great voice for narration and is a good book to have on while you want to relax. 

5 avoiding anxiety in autistic adults Luke Beardon
Another book I really enjoyed. Autistic People can really struggle with Anxiety. Living in a world which is not built for Autistic people creates levels of Anxiety which can be paralysing at times.

This books talks about Anxiety from and Autistic perspective and once again I felt very seen. I felt quite comforted listening to it. 

6 outsider live Sarah Millican
I am a major fan of Sarah Millican. She sounds like someone I used to know and her voice is very comforting. So whilst I was in bed feeling poorly I listened to her recording of a live show and it was nice. Plus it made me laugh. 

7 comfort book Matt Haig
The thing I liked about this one is it was just short snippets. But it really made you think about self care and how you can make small changes or think in a different way to allow yourself to feel a sense of Self Comfort. 

8 all of the marvels Douglas Wolk
I absolutely love Marvel. My favourite is Spiderman. This was the first character I ever came across.

The book is quite long, but with good reason, the guy is talking about the whole Marvel Universe, or as good as.

There’s so much he delves into, not just major characters but also ones which didn’t have many of their own comics.

If you are a fan of Marvel I again urge you too read this on. 

9 beyond the wand Tom Felton
This was good listen in that Tom Felton is being very open about his mental health. Which is brilliant. He is very open and honest about his journey in the acting world and how he found it difficult adjusting to life after Harry Potter.

I am a major advocate for people being able to talk about Mental Health. It is really important we have spacers where we can talk about how we feel so we don’t let things get bottled up and overflow.

Again I would urge anyone to listen to this book and hopefully it will enable them to feel less alone.

This was just a list of all the books I listened to last year and what I thought to them. If you have any book suggestions please leave them in the comments. Books are great because we can share our thoughts and we can delve into a completely different world where we can learn about something new.

Happy Reading,

Self Care and Tea

Hello all,

I hope your 2023 is going well. Apparently at this point we have reached ‘Blue Monday’ whereby we have all thrown our resolutions out the window and thought ‘forget that’.

Well how about instead of forgetting that resolution you just hit pause instead? I mean did you pick something impossible to give up? Do you try a new hobby which is becoming more of a chore? Perhaps you picked more than one resolution?

I haven’t bothered with anything this year which is too taxing, I want to enjoy more audiobooks because I like reading. That’s it. I just want to do one thing which I enjoy.

Looking straight down into a teapot with a tea bag brewing inside.

Plus I can incorporate another thing I love- tea. I absolutely love tea. As I am writing this I am enjoying a cup of Twinnings Lemon and Ginger tea. It is quite warming. Its good to relax with.

One thing I realised last year is I can feel overwhelmed at times which gets my head overwhelmed. It might not be a lot by other peoples standards, but to me it is a lot. Which is why, by focussing on books and tea I can tell myself to slow down and be kind to myself. So ask yourself, is your resolution allowing you to be kind to yourself? Mine hopefully will.

I can use books to learn more, I can use them to relax and unwind. Books are amazing to me and I used to love reading physical books. I am grateful audiobooks are a thing because if they were not I would have fallen out of love with reading, as I almost did.

So please remember to be kind in whatever goal you have given yourself. It is only the 16th of January. We still have plenty of time.

Thank you for reading,
Philippa B.

Other blogs you might enjoy:

Navigating Visual Stress
2019 Books So Far

Rugby League World Cup

Hello all,

Hope you’re well.

Over the past few weeks I have been enjoying the Rugby League World Cup. The world cup is being held in England which is amazing because I don’t have to worry about time zones and missing any games.

I love rugby league and soon as I knew England were going to be hosting I wanted to go to a game. My brother bought us tickets for a semi final at Elland Road for my Birthday, my Birthday is not on this day. Then I got a new England shirt designed for the world cup.

As we all know the pandemic hit and the games were moved into the next year. Now they’re finally here I am able to enjoy all the rugby league I want.

One of the best things about these games is that they are all happening at the same time, Men’s, Women’s, Wheelchair games and for the another first the Physical Disability Rugby League World Cup. Which England have won. Which is incredible.

As a Disabled person who is also a woman this makes me very happy. The BBC and the RLWC organisers have ensured that all major games are being shown across the BBC. This means they are getting air time to all games. Showing everyone that Rugby League is a game for all.

Next Friday we will be setting off into Leeds for some food and then going to Elland Road. I am really excited. I am aware that as a Visually Impaired Person it might have been better to watch it on TV so I can see and have the commentary. But my brother got us great seats, not too far back and close to the try line so we should see some amazing tries. Plus when you have an opportunity to see a World Cup you take it.

Over the past few weeks I have been following on Twitter and the fans are really getting behind the games which is great to see. We’ve also had some amazing commentary from some incredible legends of the game such as Robbie Paul, as a Bulls Fan this has been great to have him commenting. Tanya Arnold has been brilliant with championing the game in general and I’ve enjoyed her commentary throughout.

I have also found Andrew Voss’s commentary to be brilliant, not just on the pitch but his V ratings of some of Englands finest foods- he didn’t get all the extras when ordered a kebab so he rated it as poor. He was told he would need to order it again add the sauce and salad. Vossy also loved the ever humble Greggs sausage roll.

The other first which I have enjoyed is Kasey Badger refereeing a mans game for the first time! Incredible work and the responses to this on Twitter were incredible.

Me and my friend were going to watch the first women’s game at Headingley, England v Brazil….but unfortunately we were both working. I watched Australia v Cook Islands on iPlayer for their first game and the tries just kept coming! Pelite just couldn’t be stopped.

Can you tell I love rugby? If you want to see more about this incredible World Cup of firsts follow this link.

As I say the commentary has been wonderful and I have really enjoyed it. I love rugby and the community within it. Here’s to the start of the Wheelchair games this evening. Claire Balding is out supporting the team as she is the President of the RFL Council. Come on England!

Are you enjoying the rugby? Let me know.
Twitter: @PhilippaB

Navigating Visual Stress by using colours

Hello all,

The weather is most definitely on the turn. I do enjoy autumn. Currently sat with a nice cup of decaf tea. It’s after 2pm after all.

As a visually impaired person something I try to do is get things that are important in different colours. These colours tend to be bright so I can spot them. For example my purse is red, my yearly planner is red and my AirPods case is red. But you can see what the problem is here… everything is red. This means when I got my new phone and had to pick a case colour I opted for orange. I don’t have anything else orange.

These differences in colour are very helpful. Brighter colours enable me to spot objects and associate objects with colours. So if I am looking for something important I can find the colour. However due to the CVI this does not always help. My brain doesn’t always interpret what I am looking at. It can’t even think of colours at times because everything is overwhelming. Therefore I may just pick something up to see what it is if needs be.

CVI is something I have written about before and when I am tired it gets worse. This is because my brain cannot handle too much information at once. So by breaking things down through describing what I am looking for things can become more accessible.

Being Visually Impaired is exhausting constantly navigating a world where there is too much visual stress is overwhelming. So by breaking it down into colours or what shapes things are can make it easier.

What tips do you have to decrease your visual stress?

Thank you for reading and have a great day.
Philippa B.

A red purse and a red AirPods case.
Red Puurde and Red AirPods Case

Mind My Cain

Hello all,

It is Monday again which means it’s time for another blog post. This week I’m focusing on being a long cane user.

As you maybe aware I am Visually Impaired and use a long cane. In order for me to get around I sweep the cane across the floor in front of me to be able to find objects in my path. Including but not limited to steps, curbs, dogs and people.

Earlier this week I had gotten off the train and was making my way to the escalators. It was a busy morning and I was making my way to work. Someone was at the side of me and noticed my cane hit their leg, they looked down at my cane and continued to move forwards. The difficult and dangerous thing was that we were trying to get on the escalator. People at the other side of me noticed I had my cane, they stopped and let me get on. I said thank you.

My long cane in the centre, a red handle. In front is a train platform.

The person who had come into contact with my cane continued onto the escalator. I continued to use my cane to navigate onto the escalator and my cane caught between their legs. Once we were on the escalator I stood my cane in front of me and waited until we reached the top.

I put my cain out cautiously to find my way off. As I did this and moved forward the same person was caught by my cain.

The difficult thing with being a cain user is that we are using it for the right reasons. To discover obstacles in our path and navigate safely. The problem comes when others pay no attention. Mistakes can be made yes, but when someone actively notices your cain and continues to not give you the space you need to navigate safely then they are putting you and them at risk.

The danger in this situation is that the person who ignored my cain could have tripped up and slammed their head onto the escalator. I could have then fallen onto them. This would have been very dangerous for both us.

Similar situations can occur when cain users are crossing roads. If people ignore our cain and step into the road or don’t move out of the way then they could cause both of us to fall over.

When out and about people tend to have their headphones in to block out all the noise around them, which makes sense. But this can also mean you’re in your own little world.

This can lead to people being less aware of their surroundings. Meaning they may miss someone using a mobility aid. Which can have serious consequences.

All we ask is that you try be a bit more cautious. We are doing what we need to do to get around. We can’t travel at quieter times if we need to get to work. We shouldn’t have to travel at quiet times.

Please just be a little mindful and don’t rush people. Getting to work can be very hectic and can create stress. But if we all just try be a little more aware of our surroundings (unless, like me you’re Visually Impaired and find this difficult) we can all have an easier and smother time on public transport.

Thank you,
Philippa B. 

My Visit to Red Wings

A while ago I really wanted a nice new pair of sturdy shoes. Th reason being I have had a pair of really good shoes for nearly ten years. These shoes have started to wear, but they are still useable. I just decided I should save up and look around for a replacement.

I know a few people who have Red Wings, they have told me they are ridiculously comfortable and have never had any problems. They work with all their outfits and they look amazing.
So acting on personal advice I looked online for their shoes. The prices, while expensive seemed like a good investment- if they last you the time people have assured me they will. Hear’s to ten years of RedWings.

The pair I saw online were a petrol shade of blue. The design is 6-INCH MOC TOE WOMEN’S BOOTS 3353. I sat and thought about it for a while and struggled to find places where they had them in stock for me to try on. When I am spending that much money on shoes I need it to be right.

When I went to London to visit my brother we went to the Red Wings shop.It was nice inside. All the shoes neatly on display with storage boxes stacked at the end of the room waiting for peoples new shoes to be taken home.

A PAIR OF pETROL blue shoes with white soles on a wooden floor.

I wandered around and I saw the shoes I was looking at online. The lady asked if we were ok and needed anything. I mentioned looking at this particular pair online and that I was considering buying them, but that I wanted to try them on.


She brought me over the size I would need and asked if I had owned Red Wings before. After explaining I hadn’t and that my brother and some friends owned them she told me how sturdy they are and long lasting. She also mentioned the women’s shoes are made from the leather of a cow because the female leather is a lot softer. Then she explained the insoles had a soft cushion.

I laced them up which was easy, my Dyspraxic fingers were ok with the laces. They felt really comfortable as I wandered around the shop. My toes didn’t touch the ends I felt really comfy. Taking them off I decided to buy them. They were the last pair in the shop and Red Wings were not making anymore of them. That was the universe telling me to buy them.

The shoes are placed in individual bags and then placed into their big box. The lady had to get more bags sent from the mens shop. Someone came round and we placed them in the bag. My brother carried the box as we wandered off to get some tea.

The shoes were amazing and I really enjoyed the customer service. She was not pushy, she chatted to us about the brand and made it feel like a great experience. This is what I want when I go shopping. Especially when I am spending that much on shoes.

I am also in no way being endorsed by Red Wings for this blog.

Bird and Blend

Hello all,

As promised I will write about a few of the nice things I did when I visited London a few weeks ago to spend time with my Brother. 

A few of you may already know that I absolutely love tea. When I visited my brother he took me to one of my favourite places to buy tea.

We went to Bird and Blend in Angel. The shop is down a small bustling street with little cafes and shops. The shop has a step up into it and is not too big inside. When we went in a lady approached us and asked if we would like to try a sample of some tea.

Then we had a look along the shelves which ran down the right hand side of the shop. There were big silver tins of tea all labeled up, underneath there were packets of tea in different sizes ready to be picked up. There were a few cups and bottles for iced tea. I wanted a cup but I wasn’t allowed one. I have far too many already.

There’s even more tea behind the counter and I could feel myself getting very excited. I’ve never been to a Bird and Blend shop before. The lady behind the counter asked if I wanted to see any of the teas. I asked to see one of my preferred bedtime teas, Dozy Girl. It smelt lovely. Then I went through all of my personal choices when buying from them. The lady seemed happy that I had heard of them before and that I was excited to be able to visit them for the first time. They don’t have many shops up North, they are mostly Southern based.

There were some small pins on the counter so my brother helped me decide which one I wanted. I chose the T-Rex pin badge.  How could I visit their fabulous shop without buying anything? You’ll be pleased to note I bought Rhubarb and Custard teabags.

The teabags from Bird and Blend are compostable so I know they are good for the environment. The pins I bought are made of metal and wood. So this is another win.

When we were deciding on a pin I was getting excited because I was really enjoying being in the shop and they were playing one of the best songs from Beauty and the Beast Gaston. Sadly though Bird and Blend do not use antlers in all of their decorating…in fact I couldn’t see any anywhere.

We bought the pin and tea then we were eon our way. The people in the shop were lovely and I had a great time.

When I got home my pin badge had popped off whilst on my coat. I decided to email them to see if I could request a replacement. The reply was quick and very helpful. Someone called Ian sent me out a replacement pin and sent me one of their favourites as well.

Bird and Blend are a fabulous company who are making some lovely blends and doing it with our planet it mind. Please take a look on their website and give them a try. 

Also go to their shops and say hello, they were very friendly and they defiantly know their brews. Thank you for a lovely visit. 

Wooden shelves with teabags in paper packaging and big silver tins filled with. ore tea.
Brew-tea-ful display

I wrote this blog myself after a fabulous visit! I am in no way associated with the TeaRific company.

Travel to London

They forgot about you.

It has been a long time since I have visited my brother in London, the last time was before the Pandemic.

We decided when would be the best time for me to visit then I booked tickets to go on the train. First we had to phone for assisted travel as I am Visually Impaired and need help navigating my surroundings. I have Scoliosis and need help carrying my bags.  Once we had booked the assisted travel I had to book tickets. This required phoning a separate number. We got the trains booked and I requested tickets be sent to my house. The assisted travel booking came through by email.

Going to London using assisted travel or coming back from London has always been stressful for various reasons.

For those of you who don’t know, assisted travel is a service offered to train users who are Disabled or who need assistance with their travel. You phone up, or use the Passenger Assistance app and you tell them what you need assistance with, when you are travelling and what your Disability is.

The Friday came for me to go to London and my mum took me to the station and we let someone know I was there. The lady was very helpful and told us to take a seat. We waited and a man came over to help me onto the train. He took my bag and helped onto the train. My mum got on too. He guided me to my seat, put my bag up overhead and explained where everything was and that there were people getting on at Doncaster who would be sitting next to me.

My mum and the member of station crew got off. A lady came up to me from the Grand Central train crew and introduced herself. Finally the train set off and we were on our way.

Arriving in London I messaged the family group chat so my brother could see that I was there. Even though he was watching my train come in.

Everyone got off the train and I stayed sat down. I looked around and I couldn’t see anyone who was coming to help me. I was getting stressed. I messaged my brother.

Just to make clear, when you are waiting for assisted travel they tell you that you should never be waiting more than 5 minutes for someone to come and help you.
The other thing to note is that the assisted travel arrangements are with the station crew, unless something happens along the journey and then the train crew help.

A few moments later I heard some voices and the cleaner came bustling down the aisle emptying bins and tidying up. She noticed me and asked if I was waiting for assistance. I said yes and she said she’d be back. Messaging the group chat again I wrote what was happening. The lady came back and said she had told the driver.

This is the best bit. The driver contacted the station staff who had forgotten about me. Well done Kings Cross.

A man came on to get me and he didn’t introduce himself he just said ‘is this your bag?’ We went to get off and when we were on the platform he didn’t offer me his arm so I could be guided safely. He was carrying one small bag with clothes and another tote bag. But he should have guided me. He should have introduced himself with ‘Hello my name is…’

A little further down the platform the train crew caught up and said they would help me get to the barriers. I took their arm and we wandered down the platform. I explained I was meeting my brother and what outfit he had on.

We met up with him near the barriers and headed down to the tube.

I will post separate blogs about my weekend.

The Monday morning came and we got the bus back to kings Cross and arrived half an hour before my train.
The station wasn’t too busy and we made our way to the Assistance point. The lady radioed through to let them know I was there. She radioed again. She radioed again. By this point I was again getting stressed. Finally after a while the LNER lady just said she’d do it herself.

She was very nice and explained we were in no rush and we will just wander onto the platform. She saw the train was in and we got on. Again she directed me to my seat. I said goodbye to my brother and sat down. He messaged in the group chat that I was on the train. 

A tote bag and my folded up long cain on the train table.
All ready to go London

We mentioned what happened on the way down and how I was left. She apologised and said she would ring Leeds and let them I was on the train.

When I arrived at Leeds I stood up once everyone else was off and a man in a blue Northern Rail jacket approached me and took my bag and helped me off the train. We got to the Bradford train and I explained what happened at London and he shook his head. But I pointed out I have always had great service at Leeds and  Bradford Interchange (and Forster Square). I sat down and had my bags next to me. The conductor asked where I was going to and I said Bradford. He said he was changing there so if no one got on to help he would assist me off the train.

Once we stopped at Bradford a man got on and grabbed my bag and helped me off the train. I sat down outside the barriers and waited for my Mum.

Every other station was brilliant, I have always had great help at Bradford and Leeds, their staff are lovely.

At Kings Cross I was left on the train, there was no assistance to meet me to help me board the train to come home. So someone else had to do it.

Staff who do the job of assisted travel should have Disability training. This is why it is not OK that someone else filled the gap. The lady who helped was lovely and seemed concerned about my previous experience and genuinely wanted to help.

This kind of scenario happens far too often and this is why I do not like travelling independently. I am Visually Impaired and use a long cane to navigate my surroundings. I cannot just get on a train and go where I want. The assisted travel service which I and many others rely on had let me down on parts of my journey.


When you are Disabled you are reliant on others to help you. These services are in place to enable us to get around and be independent. However they let us down more often than you think.

Then there are the people who do a great job in these stations who hear these stories. They are also being let down because they are doing an amazing job, but then others are letting them down by not doing their jobs properly.

As I mentioned before the staff at my usual stations are brilliant and are always on hand to explain and assist me with my journeys. The lady at Kings Cross who got me onto the train was very helpful. The cleaner who notified someone I was still waiting was helpful.

But none of that should have happened. It should have been smooth, the assistance should have been there. As Disabled people we are tired of raising the concerns and seeing others go through it time and time again. But because we are Disabled and a very marginalised community the outrage is minimal.

Imagine you can’t see very well and you have constant back pain due to a curved spine. How would you feel being left on a train when you had booked assisted travel before hand? The thought that if someone wasn’t there at the other end meeting you and had no one to also help you raise your concerns and ensure someone was helping you on your journey ?

It is not acceptable. If you have experienced this before please leave your comments below.